It was parade day today. In the morning we headed into town and chilled around and shopped and things. Nothing too heavy, though.

I had to take the car back in the morning to some stroppy guy in Hertz who complained I was almost late. He was whining that it was 11.59 and the office shut at 12, so I pointed out that my watch said it was five to and that it was always right (what with belonging to a customer and all) and that he really should chill out. It was a bit more drawn out than that but I won the conversation and he was quite polite after that. Annoyed that the day I start to get my bearings in the car it has to go back.

After some more shopping and a sushi lunch, (like Yo!, but less up its own arse) we went back to the apartment for a little sleep and then got ourselves ready to go out on the parade route.

The parade was astonishing. We didn't queue in Oxford Street because I didn't need to stand around for five hours to get a vantage point and once you've seen one procession. With that in mind we all headed up to Moore Park where the parade ended, which was just as good but with fewer people. It also gave us some more time in bed and get there at 10pm. I rang Philip to tell him all about it.

The party was bigger and more spectacular than anything I have ever seen before. I rang Owen and Joel to tell them both about it but failed to describe it. It was a bit like Treat on the Street in Manchester, only ten times the size. 25,000 gorgeous bodies (24,998 and Jon and me) heaving on the dancefloor with shows every hour and mind-blowing laser shows.

The shows were good. The first was 10 Madonnas doing "Music," backed by 50 dancing gorgeous boys in jeans and another lot in cowboy hats and pompoms. (And little else). The second was some Diva singing something I vaugely remembered surrounded by about 20 Brad Pitts with legs up to their armpits in Flamenco dresses (very "Strictly Ballroom") and another 20 or so in lycra trunks. Eye candy galore.

Danced pretty much all night. Everyone else was on E (dull) and bouncing a lot, but I carried on too. Had a bit of a fade at about 5am, but a bit of a chill and a whore (accidentally I stumbled across the dark room and didn't leave until it was, er, light...) left me ready to dance through until 10am!

Jon was completely off his tits which was quite amusing. Everyone seemed quite genuinely astonished that I could bounce all night with little problem. Must be all that excess fat I'm carrying out with me...